The Truth About Homosexuality is Compassionate



Forward by Fr. Benedict Groeschel, C.F.R.

Questions Addressed

What does the Bible say about homosexuality?Born to Love looks at the Bible, from Genesis to St. Paul, simplifying the twisted scriptural arguments used to justify homosexuality by putting the passages in question in the context of all of Scripture.

How would Jesus Christ address persons in a homosexual relationship? • Fr. Waiss connects various examples from Christ’s life to different situations encountered by those with same-sex attraction or living an actively gay or lesbian life-style. 

Is homosexuality intrinsically disordered? Does the Catholic Church single out homosexual persons as more evil and disordered than other sinners? • Born to Love explains the different meanings of the term homosexuality; how homosexuality fits in with the Church’s full teaching on marriage, sexuality, and the family; how the person is never intrinsically disordered; and how other inclinations are also intrinsically disordered.

Are gay rights, “marriage,” and adoption true human rights issues, like interracial marriage? • Fr. Waiss explains how discrimination and marginalization is never moral; but also how homosexuality differs from race or gender; how it is understandable that gay and lesbians want stable family relationship, but that does not give them or anyone else the right to adopt or to marry any which way he or she chooses. 

What does science say about homosexuality? Is same-sex attraction genetic? • Born to Love surveys the science but then shows that it should make no difference whether same-sex attraction is genetic or not. He compares it to how genetic factors may incline some people to alcoholism, but that doesn’t remove their moral responsibility for  driving drunk or beating the spouse and children.

Does legalizing and accepting the gay/lesbian lifestyle make them happy? • Born to Love surveys the social sciences on whether gays and lesbians are really happier and experience more peace in societies that readily accept their lifestyle. The book explains how the Catholic Church tries to help them—and all persons—to exercise their freedom responsibly.

Is same-sex sexual activity the same as husband-wife sex acts? Does the Catholic Church consider all sex acts that cannot produce babies immoral because they objectify the other person? • Fr. Waiss addresses the Church’s holistic goodness of sexual intercourse, including for those couples who are unable to conceive. He also address the difference between husband-wife relations and homosexual activity.

Is it more charitable to change one’s views on the immorality of homosexuality, to accept the gay lifestyle as morally good? Born to Love shows us how to love a person unconditionally, that is, not conditioned on changing one’s views. But this goes both ways: gays and lesbians should not condition their love for us on whether we change, to manipulate or coerce Christians to change their views. 

Is the gay/lesbian identity healthy? • Fr. Waiss explains how fragile is an identity based on performance, attraction, sexual satisfaction, sexual abuse, or a relationship-hole. He goes on to explain the Christian personalism of Popes John Paul II and Benedict XVI that shows how a healthy and mature identity is based on solid relationships?

Are parents to blame for their child’s homosexuality? Born to Love explains how it is not helpful to focus our attention on who to blame, but on truly loving and helping the person, just as we would on someone with cancer, whether or not one’s parents transferred a genetic inclination to the child.

Is there anything parents can do to prevent homosexuality in their children? • Fr. Waiss shows parents what they can do to foster a healthy, personal identity based on relationships, not performance. He also gives them some advice on what to look out for.

What is the best way to support someone with same-sex attraction? Born to Love shows one how good, non-erotic friendships helps one develop a solid identity and sense of self-worth.

Can therapy help one with same-sex attraction? • Fr. Waiss shows how therapy can help one resolve some of the emotional barriers to healthy relationships—such as fear, anger, or resentment. Healthy relationships  are key to a healthy identity. 

Can 12-step programs help one with same-sex attraction? Born to Love addresses the ability of support groups and accountability partners in helping one resolve some of the emotional barriers to healthy relationships. 

How does spiritual direction help someone with same-sex attraction? • Fr. Waiss shows how spiritual direction can help one develop good relationships with God the Father, Christ, the Holy Spirit, the Virgin Mary, and other saints. These relationships are the supernatural basis of a good identity.

Should a person with same-sex issues resolve them through marriage? Becoming a priest or nun? Born to Love addresses how every vocation requires emotional maturity. It would be unfair to a spouse and children to use them to resolve these emotional issues. Likewise, the priesthood requires similar maturity.

Does the homosexual person have any role in the Church? • Fr. Waiss shows how those dealing with same-sex attraction often have great emotional sensitivity which they can direct toward the needs of others. Also their chaste lives can be a powerful witness to the fact that chastity is possible, especially to others with same-sex attraction.